Lesson 7 - Have love in
all your relationships
Weekly lessons that can change your life
Have love in all your relationships
Love by itself is never enough to have a relationship work. The divorce courts are full of people who love each other. For example, what good is my love for you if I treat you lousy? It's worthless. If I want my relationship with you to be great, I need to make sure you feel loved.
So what creates the experience of love? It's created by giving the gift of acceptance and appreciation. Notice how you feel when someone genuinely accepts and appreciates you. You feel empowered. You feel better about yourself and better about the other person.
The same thing happens when you accept and appreciate someone else. That person feels better about life and better about you. Then you feel empowered and automatically feel better about the other person. Then the other person feels even better about you. By giving acceptance, you create a cycle of loving, supporting and empowering each other.
Now notice how you feel when someone is judgmental or critical of you. You get hurt. You put up your walls of protection and become non-accepting in return.
The same thing happens when you are non-accepting towards someone else. That person gets upset and gives it back to you. Then you get more upset at the other person and the other person gets more upset at you. Without knowing, you create a cycle of conflict, a cycle of hurting, attacking and withdrawing from each other.
Every time you interact with another person, you will either create love or destroy it, and whatever you give will come right back. So, if you want a life of love, you have to give love. You create love by accepting and empowering people just the way they are.
Unfortunately, this is often easier said than done. Some people are very difficult to accept. Fortunately, acceptance is nothing more than surrendering to the truth. People are the way they are whether we like it or not. So surrender to the truth. Then take whatever action you need to have your life be great, but do it in a way that has the other person feel loved and empowered as a human being. As you empower the people around you, you create a life of love.
Action to Take
- Notice how you feel when someone genuinely accepts and appreciates you
Notice how good this feels. Notice how you automatically become more accepting and appreciative in return. Now notice that that same thing happens when you accept and appreciate someone else. That person feels empowered and gives it back to you. If you want to have a life of love, you have to give love. Work with this until you see that this is true.
- List the people in your life who are hard to accept
Then notice that each person is exactly the way he or she is whether you like it or not. Acceptance is nothing more than surrendering to the truth. Surrendering allows you to see the truth. When you see the truth, you can see what you need to do. So surrender to the truth of the way each person is. Then do whatever you need to do.
- Make sure the people in your life feel loved
The key to having a life of love is simple. Make sure the people in your life feel loved, accepted and appreciated. If someone is hard to accept, surrender to the truth of the way the person is. Then empower the person as a human being. Remember, every time you interact with someone, you will either create love or destroy it, and whatever you give will come right back.
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