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How to be free of guilt

Guilt seems to be caused by what we did, but this is an illusion. Guilt is never caused by what we did. Guilt is something that we add later. We add guilt after we learn the consequences of our actions. This is great news because if guilt is something we create, it’s something we can heal.

The first step in releasing guilt is to find something you did that you feel guilty about. Then go back in time to the moment you did whatever you did. At that moment, didn’t you have a very particular state of mind and didn’t you see life in a very particular way? Weren’t your actions a direct result of this very limited awareness?

Now notice what would have happened if you knew then what you know today. Wouldn’t you have handled your situation in a very different way? Of course you would, but you didn’t know then what you know today.

Even if you thought you knew better, you didn’t know it enough to change your actions. You certainly didn’t know the consequences like you do now. You only knew what you knew.

In fact, you had to make your mistake in order to gain the awareness that you have today. This is the human condition. We have to learn our lessons the hard way. We then become wiser and our lives work better.

So here is the big question. Are you willing to forgive yourself for not knowing and for not being wiser and more aware? You might as well. If you look, you were doing the very best you could with the very limited awareness and ability that you had at the time. Let this in.

So forgive yourself. Forgive yourself for not being wiser and more aware. Forgive yourself for acting totally consistent with your limited ability and for any damage that was caused by your actions.

It is possible to totally release any guilt in a moment. Sometimes it takes longer. Sometimes you need to release it over time by your declaration, “I forgive myself.” Each time the guilt comes up, forgive yourself again. Eventually, the guilt stops coming back.

If you can’t release a guilt, you are probably dealing with a core issue. To find out, put yourself in the emotion of the guilt and look for the hurt. What would it say about you if you did this horrible thing? Then notice how you would feel if this were true about you. If this is painful, you are dealing with a core issue.

Guilt is very destructive. It sabotages your relationship with yourself and reinforces the feelings of being not okay. It robs you of your confidence and self-respect. Do whatever it takes to be free of all guilt.

1 Comment

  1. jan villott says:

    I think your website is amazing! It is simple to follow and loaded with information, yet not overwhelming. It allows you to leisurely wander through, grabbing nuggets. The pictures are uplifting and encouraging. If I were to try to come up with a word to describe it, it would be “hopeful”. Hope that things can truly be different!

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